I've been noticing a subtle but important shift these last few weeks. Clementine turning one has given me some breathing space, and goodness is it ever appreciated.
There's no denying that motherhood, and the first year especially, is all consuming. When you have a baby who isn't a great sleeper and who relies on you as their food source, you're pretty much tethered to them 24/7 for at least a year. Now that Clementine is a little bit bigger, more independent and eating three meals a day, I find that I'm able to leave her for longer stretches of time. The weekends have become dad time, and she is loving it.
This weekend was especially busy for me. On Saturday I taught my usual yoga class and had my first girls' night out in, oh I don't know… a year? It felt so good to be out at night, wearing clean clothes and letting my hair down (both literally and figuratively). Sunday was spent taking photos. I did three shoots: one for a friend's business, one for an article about chai tea and one for friend and fellow yoga teacher. It was a long day, and I was wiped by the end of it (especially because I still had to duck home to breastfeed, get props etc) but I also felt so inspired.
As well as working on creative projects, I've also been able to prioritise my own wellbeing now that I'm not so mind numbingly tired all the time. For the last few Fridays I've left Clementine with one of her grandparents so that I can go to a yoga class and treat myself to lunch. Last Friday I even got a massage, my first in nine months.
I love being a mom. I really, really do. But it's good to know that I'm still me, with my own interests and friends.